Handling The Hard Stuff

Category: Self-Care

  • Coping Mechanisms

    This is a time of year that is challenging for a lot of people with family difficulties or relationships that are ending. We self-heal in all kinds of ways. Other people may not understand why you’re doing what you’re doing and they may have a LOT of problems with your methods. Your coping mechanisms may…

  • Strike While The Iron Is Hot

    We don’t always have motivation to do things. Energy fluctuates, interest levels fluctuate, time and availability fluctuates. I have spent my life being a champion procrastinator. But lately I’ve been able to make small inroads on that front. I’ve found myself with more energy than usual lately – I don’t know if it’s vitamins or…

  • Take the Wins

    Do you ever find yourself in a situation where someone compliments you and you minimize or deflect it? I remember when I graduated from law school my aunt, a woman who had gone to business school at night while fighting breast cancer and raising two children under the age of five alone after divorcing an…

  • The Value of Placeholders

    Everything in life has a season. We are inundated with social media posts giving us the impression that everyone is living their best lives all the time forever. In reality, we’re all just trying to keep it all together. There is something to be said for temporary “settling” – a placeholder while you focus on…

  • You Deserve Respect

    I read a quote recently that just hit me hard. “Stop trying to prove you love someone by how much you can endure.” Oof. That resonated way too much with me. Moreso in my younger days, but even sometimes now, I have spent a lot of my life putting on a happy face and being…

  • Incremental Steps

    I get overwhelmed by a lot of “major life change” plans. And I get distracted and forget that I’m making “major life changes” a lot. This has happened with diets and exercise plans and investing strategies and a bunch of other things that I plan to change forever and just wind up going back to…

  • Making

    I find it frustrating sometimes that I don’t have anything tangible to show for my work. I help people sort out problems, but I’m not building anything or making a mark on the world in a physical way and it’s hard to mark your success and contribution when it’s not visible. I have recently become…

  • Find the Fun

    Adulting isn’t a lot of fun. There’s a lot of responsibility and pressure and mundanity. It doesn’t always have to be this way though. We can balance the boring with the fun. If you’re anything like me, you’ve lost your sparkle at times as you go through the responsible and adult activities of day to…

  • Put on Your Own Oxygen Mask First

    So often we find ourselves working so hard to help others and solve problems that aren’t our own when we aren’t actually able to help ourselves. I have so many clients that report to me how they are providing homes for their adult children while being unable to pay the mortgage on their own. I…

  • Respect is Earned

    So many times I see and hear people demanding respect based on their position or circumstance. I reject that entirely. I have seen judges be petty and gossip. I have seen teenagers carry a family on their shoulders with responsibility. The idea that certain people in certain positions can behave rudely or cruelly and they…