Sometimes it’s just more. And oftentimes more just means more drains on your time and attention and energy. More often means less focus on the things that matter.

I would rather have two pairs of jeans that fit me really well and are of high quality so I can keep them for a long time than to have ten pairs of jeans that all have a slight discomfort or reason I don’t like them.

I would rather have three close friends that I can call at any time and have a deep conversation with. I can’t sustain that kind of friendship among 15 people no matter how much I may like them.

The more things and people and activities and distractions you let into your life the less time and attention you can give to any one of those things. By adding activities and distractions you are taking away from something else you enjoy or someone else you love.

When you are pushing yourself to work more hours, ask yourself whether this is more valuable to you than whatever you are giving up – time with your family or friends, time working on your health, time to be creative and enrich yourself. Your answer may sometimes be yes and sometimes be no, but be intentional with that tradeoff.

When you are spending hours scrolling through social media or playing games on your phone, is that time worth giving up a walk outside or a family dinner at the table? Maybe this is your downtime and you are decompressing from a stressful day at work. Maybe you are learning a new recipe or exercise routine or how to care for a plant.

None of this is to pass judgment. The answers will be different for different people. I have a good friend who regularly works 80 hours per week and earns more than double my salary. He grew up in poverty and that money matters to him. But he trades his free time to have more money.

For him that is the more that matters. My more is a flexible work schedule and fewer hours.

There is no wrong answer, just make sure the answer you’re living is the right one for you. Make sure that you’re intentional with the tradeoffs you’re making.