Adulting isn’t a lot of fun. There’s a lot of responsibility and pressure and mundanity. It doesn’t always have to be this way though. We can balance the boring with the fun. If you’re anything like me, you’ve lost your sparkle at times as you go through the responsible and adult activities of day to day life.

I look in the mirror and see an old lady sometimes. I look at pictures of even just a few years ago and barely recognize the smile on my face. Anxiety and pressure and disaster-preparedness and all the other things that we fill our days with take a toll on our fun and sparkly selves.

But we can find ways to add some more sparkle to our normal everyday selves. Here are a few ways to add a little more pizzazz to the mundane stuff we have to do to keep the wheels on in our daily-adulty lives.

1. Add in some music. I have never enjoyed folding laundry or grocery shopping as much as I have when I’m jamming out to my favorite songs from high school. A little laundry-folding dance party for one does a number for my soul. No one cares if I’m booty-dancing in my bedroom folding a fitted sheet. And a little booty dancing makes everything a little more fun!
2. Have phone dates. My mom and I have coffee dates over phone or FaceTime. We started this during the pandemic and realized our schedules are similar enough that we are usually sitting and drinking our morning coffee and walking our dogs at about the same time. Making the connection and doing that together a few times a month makes us both look forward to our time that much more.
3. Make self-care time friend time. For years I had a designated date with my best friend for pedicures. Every time I realized my toenail polish was in need of an update, I knew it had been too long since I’d seen my friend. We’d schedule pedicures and dinner together to catch up. I’ve done the same thing with haircuts – schedule them back to back and then you get some quality bonding time while also updating your look.
4. Indulge in your favorite podcast or audiobook while running errands. I only listen to my favorite audiobook author when I’m grocery shopping. I hate grocery shopping. This gives me something to look forward to and makes the errand I hate a bit of an indulgence.
5. Sing. Literally sing in your shower or car or wherever you feel comfortable. Sing to embarrass your children. Sing to make yourself happy. Sing to your pet. The dopamine released when you sing is free happiness available for the taking.
6. Get fancy for no reason. I work from home a lot these days. I wear sweats and sports bras and my hair is always up and rarely clean. It’s hard to feel beautiful when you see that in the mirror every day. Some days I can get there, but some days it makes me depressed. On those days I put on earrings. And makeup. And fix my hair. When I need a little confidence bump, I intentionally make an effort. It’s good to remind ourselves that we’ve “still got it”. We tend to lose ourselves in the shuffle when we get so busy keeping it all together for everyone else in our lives. This doesn’t have to be physical – it is for me. But whatever makes you feel more confident and beautiful, that’s the thing you should take a little time to do that day. Not all the time, but just put yourself together so you remember that you still have “that” (whatever that is for you) in you when you call upon it.

These are silly little things, but more than anything it’s an attempt to make a conscious effort to look for yourself – it may take a minute to find yourself again, but you have to go looking. If you’ve lost your sparkle and are feeling frumpy and unfulfilled, take some steps to shake it up. This is not a prescription for every day happiness. This is a suggestion that if you’re feeling slightly lost, throw on some music and have a dance party/sing along/fancy day to give yourself a little superficial pick-me-up until you can remind yourself on a deeper level that you’re a badass inside and out.