Breaking News: We don’t all care about the same things.

My closest friends and I value things so incredibly differently. I do NOT care about having a nice car, I care that I don’t have a car payment. My closest friends have brand new cars – a few of them even lease them just so they’ll continue to have the newest thing. That matters to them.

There is way too much noise out there about how to be financially responsible. The reality is, being “good with money” is something we each have to define for ourselves. How we prioritize investing – individual stocks? High Yield Savings Accounts? Real Estate? Index Funds? How we prioritize saving – Emergency fund, sinking funds, brokerage accounts? More than half your income? and How we prioritize spending.

The reality is, your definition of being “good with money” will be different from mine and that is completely acceptable. Your budget should be based on how you value things.

Personally, my biggest priority is freedom. I want to live cheaply now so I can maximize vacations now and retire as early as possible. I want to increase my income and net worth while decreasing the amount of hours I need to dedicate to wealth generating.

For others, there is a particular bag or phone or car that they’ve always wanted. It is a sign of success to that person and they absolutely should incorporate that into their budget. My friends leasing their cars also work themselves really hard and spend a lot of time in their cars. It makes complete sense that they want a little more luxury in something they spend so much time in.

The point is, no one can dictate what is the right place for you to spend your money. It doesn’t have to make sense to other people. Your budget should be based on satisfaction. If buying a fancy brand-new house brings you absolute happiness, then build your budget around that house payment.

We can’t have everything. There has to be a give and take in your budget. Most of us can’t afford to eat out every single night, live in the most amazing house/apartment, drive the flashiest car, invest in our retirement, fill up our emergency funds, wear designer clothes, and also pay all the household bills necessary to fund this life. But you also don’t have to live in poverty today just to invest in your future.

Prioritize what matters to you in your budget. I’m not a foodie. I could eat salad in a bag every night and be completely content. But I am a wine snob. If I’m going to drink wine it’s going to be decent wine. I adjust my budget accordingly. I care about a flexible schedule and work-life balance today so I’ve reduced the hours I work – and have reduced my earning potential in the process. I recognize that and have adjusted my budget accordingly so I can still maximize my retirement and savings account. I just don’t have a gym membership anymore and don’t buy much coffee or food outside the house. I also work from home a lot more so nice clothes, makeup, and gas are much lower bills than they used to be.

We all pick what matters to us. The important thing is that we build our budget around those things rather than just trying to have it all. Be responsible – don’t ignore a retirement account because you want to go to happy hour every night – but maybe you don’t care about putting extra away for vacations or that Louis Vuitton bag, or a down payment for a house. Those are all choices. Make your budget choices intentional, but make them yours. And if anyone tells you you’re not being good with money you tell them to jump in a lake. You’re good with your money and that’s all that has to matter.

Live the life you want and fund it appropriately.