I don’t know about you, but I have a REAL solid case of imposter syndrome. It’s gotten better with age, but I constantly live with the belief that other people know more than I do. So I’ve developed some tricks to fool myself into believing I can do whatever thing has me overwhelmed in the moment.

1. Wonder Woman pose. I know this sounds ridiculous, but there are actual peer-reviewed studies that show that holding the wonder-woman pose for two minutes a day increases confidence and decreases stress (and the accompanying hormones – testosterone and cortisol). Can you imagine if just by standing confidently with your hands on your hips while you wait for the coffee to brew in the morning you actually managed to feel more confident and less stressed throughout the day? Here’s a link to the TED talk and more information on the issue. But give it a try. Maybe you’ll feel like a badass all day.
2. What’s the worst that could happen? I often get into a stressed-out spiral about an upcoming trial or presentation or other event and one way I calm myself down is to think things through the logical conclusion. I’m freaked out about a court appearance – what’s the worst that can happen? My client is found guilty, okay then what happens? We argue for probation the state argues for prison. Okay, if client gets prison time, what does that look like? Often times, talking myself through the worst-case scenario and thinking about the actual consequences of that worst-case help me calm down and put things back in perspective. For a lot of my clients prison time is not the end of the world. If they aren’t panicking about the outcome of this stressful thing, why am I?
3. Calming self-talk. I grew up training horses, especially babies. They’re fun and also nutty. They spook, they spin, they react like wackadoos when they see something new. So anyone working with young creatures (the same is true for dogs, horses, cows, children) learns to find a soothing and calming voice to help these creatures be reassured in an uncertain new world. For me, I settled into “smooth jazz radio DJ voice” that’s low and quiet and usually am just repeating ReeeeeeLaaaaaaax in that slow and low tone. It worked pretty well for horses and lately I’ve found myself saying it in my head to calm my own anxious thoughts. Just take a few seconds and soothe yourself in the way you would with a scared or crying child.
4. Dress and Play the Part. My mom was a choir director both at school and at church. And I was her sidekick. So I grew up performing in front of people. I speak in front of people for a living. I still have a huge fear of it. Long ago I developed a “stage persona”. It’s not me standing in front of a microphone in a room full of hundreds of lawyers, it’s the character I’m playing. It’s not me arguing to a jury, it’s my client’s advocate. In those scenarios that are anxiety-inducing for me as a person, I assume the character and dress and play the part. When I know I have to be a grown-up lawyer, I’m wearing a suit. I’m putting on makeup. I’m wearing heels. That’s not me, I spend my days in running shoes and a frizzy ponytail. But when it’s time to be the professional adult, I can don the uniform, practice my lines, and play the part. The older I get the more I realize everyone is doing this to an extent.

The most important thing is that you realize everyone feels like an imposter at least some of the time. That is where we learn. If you never leave your comfort zone you never develop new skills or knowledge. So the only way to grow is to feel like an imposter.

Look at it as a welcome sign – feeling like you’re faking it means you’re trying something new and building a bigger comfort zone. Good for you.

We’re all faking it on some level. Embrace it, pretend you know what you’re doing and belong where you belong, and eventually you actually will be the one that knows what they’re doing. Good for you for trying and sticking with it.